My disabled DS is moving out!
After many, many years of planning, lobbying, petitioning and filling out an inhuman amount of paperwork, he is going. It's a 2 bedroom public housing unit, completely wheelchair accessible. He will share with a cousin who has completed AIN training, and be supported almost entirely by family and friends. with very little paid care. An assistance dog is also on the wish list.
It's an exciting and terrifying time.
DS is 19 and totally physically dependent due to the disability of Cerebral Palsy. How does someone who is confined to a wheelchair, and can't even blow their own nose live independently? It does, will and should happen. He has the same dreams and desires as an ablebodied person, chief among them, having a home of his own. The fact that we have had to spend 9 years....5 passively planning, and 4 actively campaigning...for this to happen is crazy. But we're there. It's still a long road ahead, and things will not always go smoothly but for now, we are all basking in the glow of accomplishment.
Much to be done...little time to do it all....so finding Mimi is low on the list of priorities in some respects, but in others, right on target.
Many friends and family members have been saying to me in the last few days "You won't know what to do with yourself" (once DS moves out).....well, guess what....YES I WILL!
It's always been my plan that DS not have to wait until I am on my death bed to experience life without me. And likewise that I am doing the responsible thing by unleashing him on the world to make his own mistakes without my interference. He is a smart guy, he'll show them how it's done.
He is already involved in study, a wheelchair sport, mentors other wheelchair students, mentors young people with CP, is involved in the local football club, attends the cricket and tennis in summer and has a large circle of friends.
Whilst I will ALWAYS be there for him, we now all move to a new chapter in our lives.
Frightening, exhilarating, and...yes.... painful. We will now have a spare room where he has lived, and THAT will be tough. Not knowing where he is every minute of every day, and what he's doing and who he's with and whether he might get sick or eat too much junk or run up his mobile bill or not be able to pay his power bill....but then....that's how it is for all young people moving out of home....so we will cope.
Wish us luck.